Chakras, Parenting, Self-Care
Understanding our chakras is critical to healing ourselves and understanding many of the challenges and opportunities for self-reflection and growth that parenting presents. This overview is for a more in depth understanding of chakras for a parent who desire to destroy generational cycles and activate sacred self-care.
First, Chakras are seven spinning wheels of energy within the human energy field that keeps our psychological, emotional and spiritual well-being in harmony. These wheels of energy start from the base of our spine and go up to a few inches above our head. Knowledge of chakras is thousands of years old, found in spiritual texts of India and used to treat mental, spiritual and physical diseases with much success throughout history. Your chakras are the invisible connection between your physical countenance and your metaphysical existence. The energy in your chakras can either be overactive, underactive or in balance. There are various factors that cause our chakras to become misaligned or blocked. When they are, we must discover the causes for the blockage and intentionally remove them. We have to have strong awareness of familial and individual patterns in order to do so.
We often discuss how a child is connected to their parents by blood and genetics, however it is my contention that there needs to be more consideration on how children are energetically and spiritually connected to their parents. How do the quality of a parents chakras affect their child? This could be a very revealing and powerful understanding because our parents’ state of emotional and spiritual wellness affects us deeply. For example, in learning about “Spirit Babies” you get to see how the energetic cord of a couples’ unborn child is attached to them awaiting the spiritual or emotional readiness of the parent, oftentimes the mother, to bring the child forth. Many mothers can feel their child emotionally and spiritually before conceiving or having them. I dreamt of my daughter before having her. She came into my emotional awareness before I knew the circumstances of her physical manifestation. If you are attempting to conceive without success, consider seeing a medium for assistance – they may reveal a spiritual circumstance blocking the child’s arrival or shed light on other things that amplify your self-awareness and ease through knowing who you are. Furthermore when you’ve had a child and you are experiencing difficulties with them, it may serve you well to look within to see where you may need to become more aware of your needs and heal.
As previously stated, when a Chakra is out of balance, the area of the person’s life that it dictates is also out of balance. For instance, the throat chakra dictates the ability to unapologetically speak your truth, if this is blocked, cloudy, or minimized in anyway — you experience the inability to get your needs met, speak your truth, express yourself (in speaking or writing), etc. You may even have an issue with over or under eating. These will affect your child because he/she will observe your behavior, feel your energy and mimic your actions, thereby affecting their chakras. I will speak more about the chakras and how they affect your parenting, and any manifestations they may have in your child. Below are the Chakras and the power they have in the mothering bond, recognizing how imbalances manifest in the chakras, and tips for self-care in healing any blockages around the chakras.
ROOT CHAKRA – Represented by the color red is said to be the chakra that determines how grounded you are in your self-awareness, connection to the earth and feelings of personal safety on the earth. This is the base chakra that begins the unlocking of the chakras. This chakra is most important when considering the mother/child bond. In childhood we feel safe when we are affirmed, appreciated, feel seen and heard and have a healthy attachment to people that protect and care for us. As an adult we require the same – we also must develop a deeper bond with our spiritual entourage (guides, benevolent ancestors) in order to feel even more stable and grounded. For many this chakra is off balance because there isn’t a feeling of safety in the world and no trust in the stable and regenerative force of the universe but most importantly no strong bonds to safety through being sufficiently mothered. This could manifest because our mothers were not present due to work obligations or her disinterest in parenting or she did not get the same grounding and affirmation and therefore does not understand its importance or have tools to foster the groundedness. Also, oftentimes emotional disappointments where one doesn’t feel safe and supported are huge for mother/child bonds.
Symptoms of an off balance root chakra are restlessness, insecurity, anger and aggression. Lack of feeling safe and rooted will cause people to lash out. In order to practice self-care and heal, one must be clear on what their values are, develop self-trust, have a team of individuals you can trust, become rooted in mentally and spirituality, practice healthy money management where you save, invest, spend, and give back in ways that affirm your values (which root you). As a parent you must practice self-care through ensuring you feel heard, seen, loved, appreciated and affirmed through everything you do – relationships, work, and self-talk. In this way you can do the same for your child. To do so, create a positive affirmation around those areas of self-worth and wealth you desire to improve. For example, I make it a practice to say “All of my needs are met and exceeded daily” and “I am worthy of forgiveness”. I speak these when insecurities arise to re-center and ground myself. This self-awareness will create awareness and space in your spirit to activate this in your child.
SACRAL CHAKRA – The sacral chakra sits below your belly button and represented by the color orange. It is in the womb area in women and is considered a feminine chakra — directly fed by the root chakra. This is the chakra important for creation, creative ideas, your ability to nurture and be nurtured. When the sacral chakra is blocked you may feel uncertain about life and its challenges, finding it difficult to cope with any changes in a way that makes you feel out of control of your life. Detachment and rigidness, inability to ride out life’s ups and downs, low self-worth and self-esteem are all vestiges of an unhealthy sacral chakra. It is said when this chakra is blocked that depression, insecurity, fear, detachment, gynecological cysts, abnormal menstruation, back pain, constipation, inability to achieve orgasm, low sex drive (male or female), – are psychological, mental and physical manifestations. If the sacral is blocked in parents it may be difficult for parents to nurture the children. Women/Mothers need to know their worth and act accordingly whether it is how they respond to people who treat them in ways they are not in tuned with or if it is asking for what they require financially. Women/Mothers also need solid coping mechanisms for the inevitability of life. Spirituality is critical here since we tend to create chaos for ourselves because we didn’t want to deal with temporary disappointments, upsets and hurts. Developing nuance and discernment assists us with this. Feeling stable and care for, hence why our self-care in the form of loving ourselves but also allowing others to love us and the ability to receive is critical. Ylang Ylang and patchouli are essential oils that assist with healing this. My proprietary blend of essential oils EVOLVE and MANIFEST as a bath soak or energy mists assists in strengthening the Sacral Chakra energies. You can find them at mommetime.ecwid.com
SOLAR PLEXUS – This is your third chakra, represented by the color yellow. The solar plexus is located in the upper abdomen and governs how at peace you are with yourself. Primarily associated with self-esteem confidence and willpower. When you have stomach ailments this may be a result of distorted self concept. When this chakra is under active a child may not be receiving enough affirmation from caregivers, parents or other adults in their lives. They may feel judged. If it is over active they may have a distorted sense of what the world owes them due to always being affirmed even when doing incorrect things. If a parent suffers from things like the all too common IBS, constipation or other stomach upsets this can be a sign. Same for children. Excessive solar plexus energy could mean over eating, controlling behavior and fatigue/excessive laziness. An underactive solar plexus could present as lack of confidence, inability to focus/organization, insecurity anxiety and fear. I tell the story in my book “The Mommy Magic Handbook” of how I felt my daughter’s stomach issues were a manifestation of my overworking and lack of personal attention to her. I have met and spoken to many mothers who share this story. Yellow stones such as citrine, yellow meditations or energy healing that targets this area can all be beneficial, as well as developing a strong/balanced mindset about the child’s sense of self.
HEART CHAKRA – This chakra is the fourth and represented with the color green. The heart chakra governs compassion, empathy, judgement of self and others. An overactive heart chakra manifests as codependency, looking outward for acceptance or fulfillment, intense jealousy or harsh judgements of others. An under-active heart chakra manifests as shyness and feelings of loneliness, inability to forgive and lack of empathy and leading with your head more than with your heart. Repressed emotions are the primary reason your heart chakra is blocked. There may be a traumatic childhood event or a slight someone did against you. We often hold these in because we do not know how to address them. I have to say that when we as parents have these traumas, if we do not seek to actively heal them, they can pass on to our children. Reflecting, processing and speaking the truth around these significantly help in breaking the cycles. I have heard so many stories of daughters who experienced what their mothers experienced without knowing it for many years. Healing your heart means being open with your emotions, not clinging to your feelings so you can stay in the present and realize why you even have these feelings in the first place. Self acceptance and acceptance of others without judgement because we are all evolving is a powerful way to open your heart. This is essential compassion to bring to your parenting, but also with the understanding that you are nurturing a resilient child as well. Determine how/where you can open your heart in the process. This chakra is said to be the balancing between the lower and upper chakras as it is in the middle of the chakras. Green light meditations also assist with opening the heart chakra as well. These meditation can be found on youtube.
THROAT CHAKRA – The fifth chakra represented by the color blue and governs the ability to speak your truth clearly and with confidence. A blocked throat chakra is indicative of the inability to clearly express your ideas, desires and feelings for fear of being judged or ridiculed. If the throat chakra is under-active you may be stoic, fearful or quiet. An overactive throat chakra is indicated as over talking or the “gift of gab”. When this chakra is opened and balanced you are able to express yourself clearly and honestly with confidence. You also speak deliberately. Inability to express our desires is a common issue among many mothers or any woman in our families as many were taught that their desires were to be suppressed in order to rear the children, take care of the home or any other task that removed them from living out their desires. I hear women say that they never expressed a certain desire because they didn’t believe it was possible. Consider how this may affect your children? Never hearing someone express a desire then achieve it may hamper their ability to know that speaking your truth and getting what you desire as a real possibility.
Common physical signs of throat chakra blockage is sore throat, mouth sores, thyroid problems, hoarseness or neck pain. Emotional, mental blockages manifest as fear of speaking, inability to express thoughts, shyness, inconsistency in speech and actions, social anxiety, and inhibited creativity. An overactive throat chakra can manifest as deceptiveness, arrogance and manipulation.
In order to heal this, we need to release negative emotions including guilt and shame in order to reinforce our worthiness to speak our truths to get what we desire. Crying and writing are great ways to release energy in that center and restore balance. Mindful speech, actions and deeds — like only saying what you can do or what you mean. Really practicing integrity with your words. This is powerful when speaking to trusted friends or family so you can get out what you feel. Finally, since the color blue represents this chakra, incorporating it in any way is essential. Be mindful how we allow our children to express themselves too. Do you tend to squelch their ability to speak their truth? Do you allow them to speak big dreams? Are you open to hearing others speak their truth in various ways? These are all questions to assist you in developing a healthy relationship with your throat chakra. I also joined Toastmasters International in my area in order to work on my fear of speaking to groups.
THIRD EYE CHAKRA – The sixth chakra represented by the color indigo, is in between the eyebrows and is the seat of your intuition. A relationship with our intuition requires us to have a deep level of trust in our gifts, purpose and abilities. An overactive third eye often causes women to over-indulge in a fantasy world, they are not rooted and have many passing visions. An underactive third eye manifests as having no vision or trust in self. This is a difficult thing for many women and in mothering this can be even more dangerous to not have honed because not only are you charged with your own purpose and knowledge of self but also molding another to understand theirs. Balance is achieved when we can make decisions from a space of neutrality and can determine the difference between reality and dreams.
Your third eye chakra may be blocked if you struggle with overthinking, indecisiveness,lack of faith in your purpose, feeling pointless, depression and anxiety, insomnia, finding your work and life meaningless, back pain, leg pain, headaches (tension headaches in the brow area are common), and eye discomfort. Unlocking a blocked third eye requires listening to your intuition(gut feelings), finding/understanding and living your purpose and find balance between your emotions and reason. These can be difficult to do because we have often been raised in a society and families that do not honor intuition/intuitive gifts and vision but instead only what is seen like hard data. However, the tides are changing and more people are seeking a deeper meaning of life for themselves. This requires knowing yourself very well, understanding your family history and why you perform and function how you do but also trusting the small, still voice that guides you. Third eye blockage also affects our ability to visualize. Often we can not do that because of fears and anxieties related to past occurrences, being overly intellectual, and worry about the future. Trust in your inner voice allows you to visualize the life you desire and be present in the moment. It is also critical to see behind the physical or words presented to you in order to have a healthy third eye. It is critical we heal our own third eye so we can properly nurture our children. There are also other prescriptions about how to heal your third eye like wearing purple, eating purple foods and working with purple stones, all of which may be advantageous. Irrespective of the ritual you decide, everyone needs support — someone to understand their process and help them walk through it. If you are interested in receiving support and guidance in trusting yourself and releasing guilt, shame and fear blocking your intuitive gifts, schedule my Evolve the Inner Mother six-week course or sign up for individual sessions.
CROWN CHAKRA – The seventh chakra located above your head is represented by the color violet or white. It is the gateway to deeper self knowledge, connection to the universal life force energy, devotion, divine knowledge, inspiration and happiness. Connection to our spiritual selves is very critical for our understanding of our purpose and power as parents. There are so many moving parts, so many areas you may not understand or be clear about the outcome, this is why your spirituality and self-knowledge is critical. Some mental, physical and emotional blockages that manifest as a result of crown chakra under-activity are isolation – in ability to connect with others, lack of direction, in ability to set and achieve goals, thyroid issues, insomnia, depression, and self-sacrificing against higher wisdom.
Keeping the crown chakra in balance requires meditation and spiritual devotion. Imagine a white or violet light coming from above your head into your body. This is a powerful way to balance yourself. When the crown chakra is in balance you feel connected to the divine as a source of knowledge and inspiration.
In conclusion there are ways to determine how balanced your chakras are — through self-reflection, having your electromagnetic field read via machine, through a medium or a person who can read the human energy field with their eyes. It is critical to be in-tune with these energies and their effect on you so you can live your optimal life as well as direct your child’s. I hope to be able to assist you on your journey. Schedule a reiki session, past life reading, or coaching session/package HERE.
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