Diversity, Inclusion, Equity and Motherhood

The conversation on diversity, inclusion and equity must more readily include motherhood. Some mother biases include: single mothers, same sex families, working mothers, stay-at-home mothers. perception of mothers of color parenting styles mothers’ work environment capabilities and options women with one child or multiple children mothers of children with disabilities plus sized mothers – just to name a few. The purpose of this blog is not to pontificate or make some grand conclusions about HOW to achieve but instead to start by adding mothers to the conversation at large. We often live with and act on biases we receive from society, family or education. In order to view this topic differently we have to unpack how we view the topic in the first place and actively engage ourselves in questioning our perceptions. What I have observed is that the way we treat and perceive mothers is extended to the children. What are you unpacking? What are you doing to reframe the conversations around mothers? Cecile Edwards, M.Ed, Creative Director – MomEvolve

Read More →

Mommy Guilt & Woman Shame

“….the father represents the outer world point of view, the collective ideal that pressures women to be wilted rather than wildish. Even so, there is no shame and blame if you have given away the flowering boughs [psychic innocence]. Yes, you have suffered for it, no doubt. And you may have given it away for years, even for decades. But there is hope.” Mommy guilt is the uneasy, doubtful, sorrowful feeling you get for not doing something you’ve been told you ‘should’ or for doing something you think you shouldn’t have done. This guilt causes many mothers to: second guess parenting decisions, over perform or over give in the parenting dynamic sacrificing themselves without expectations or out of fear, not ask for help, feel crappy when we don’t share EVERYTHING! – Hide and have your snack mommas!, never invest in ourselves but instead on the children only, withhold/negate your dreams and goals to uplift the children in their activities, etc., and feel like you shouldn’t feel or act a certain way about an issue or topic related to your child based on social pressures – not your values. These are just a few that I’ve experienced. How does mommy guilt affect you? (more on this later) Woman shame is the feeling that something is wrong with you because of something that has been done to you or you’ve done.  Shame causes women to hold on to secrets that are insidious […]

Read More →

Self-Care is a Journey – not a destination

I define self-care as the mental, emotional, physical and spiritual care we give ourselves in an integrated way and indefinitely. By this I mean that self-care is not about a one time trip to the mall, hair or nail salon. Self-care is about the intention in that trip, how you feel about life and yourself before taking that trip and whether that feeling is true. Self-care is NOT unintentional in this definition. Self-care requires self-awareness, reflection and initiative to shift. Self-care requires patience, self-love and the ability to forgive and […]

Read More →

New Year Resolutions are Actually Self-Care affirmations

Self-Care is always on my resolution list. Happy New Year! Welcome to day 11 of 2019 and day 14 of my personal New Year! While we are celebrating the New Year as a whole, I just celebrated my PERSONAL New Year aka, my birthday, on December 29th and this is the time for ME to reset and revisit my year.   Self-Care is the critical piece of my ALL my resolutions because as I define in my book, self-care is the mental, physical, emotional, spiritual work we do to heal ourselves daily.  Every intention we set, every word we utter, every thought we think is either taking us away from wellness or adding to our wellness.  Therefore, our self-care is integral to our well-being on all levels and the foundation for our goals/resolutions/intentions.  I realize that in 2018 I did some amazing things! I spoke at conferences, started a podcast, nurtured postpartum doula/mentoring clients, took some amazing courses, healed my spirit and some relationships deeply, lost some relationships, traveled to new places and so much more. All of these were goals/intentions I started 2018 with and I nurtured my mind, body, spirit and actions to achieve them! This year, my focus is on even DEEPER self-care by challenging myself to go higher and cross into uncharted territories.  This includes: wealth building, creating legacy, deepening relationships I already have while creating healthier ones, more travel, more uninterrupted self-focus with unapologetic self-intimacy.  (I am smiling so hard when I […]

Read More →

The Space Between

Recently I have been thinking heavily on how we acquire knowledge but don’t apply it.  We are all at different stages.  In certain areas in my life, I apply knowledge quickly and indefinitely.  In some areas such as creating boundaries and weight loss – I have a corpus of knowledge that has yet to be applied or tried and failed on occasions. When I first started learning Reiki, for example, the process made so much sense to me.  Something to LIVE rather than study.  However, I struggled with applying it […]

Read More →

Keeping a clean home is not about judgement – it is about staying in your flow and power

Garnering and maintaining energy while keeping up with the many duties that women, specifically busy mothers have to tackle daily can be daunting when the purpose of the duties are for others consumption and perception.  As I grew and became more aware of my power as a woman, mother and manager of my home I realized how certain ideas that had been ingrained in me about keeping my home clean both helped and hindered my own energy and the energy of my home.  Let me paint the scene: “Her house is dirty – how is she letting people come to her dirty house” “She a nasty woman – look at her house” “Keep your house clean or others will look at you like you are nasty” We all heard some variation of these statements growing up and more specifically as adults.  In fact, women often struggle after delivery of their child with the idea of their homes not being clean – not from a perspective that a clean home will enhance their energy but from the perspective that they will be looked at unfavorably as a woman for keeping a nasty home.  We must shift the viewpoint with which we filter many of the lessons we learned as women about our value from judgement of our selves to the power of our roles. Keeping your home clean is essential because a clean home – the primary place of manifestation – […]

Read More →

Ways we can “Mother Ourselves”into healing and self love

Mothering ourselves can be a bit tricky to navigate.  First, we have to removed the gendered identity of thinking love is a womanly “soft” love.  Instead we have to think of it as universal, ebb and flow, tough and ease – a dichotomy of emotional stances we must build within ourselves in order to grow and develop.  For example, a child doesn’t need an adult to softly speak ‘stop’ when they are about to burn themselves, they need that adult to go snatch them away from the fire.  That is mothering too.  And it also does not have to come through a woman – mothering is the nurturing needed at the moment and it is intuitive, but not always painless. I realized I was mothering myself, not out of an absence of motherly love (though for some that is a starting point) but out of the desire to become who I truly am and to sincerely and earnestly be loved by ME.  Self love and adoration through your intuitive needs is the ultimate Mothering of Self because it requires reflection, honesty and changed behavior and it comes from a universal source that is here to nourish your highest self. When I was determining if I should stay in my EdD program or leave, I decided that I should leave because it was not in my best interest at the time.  My Inner Mother, in all her wisdom, showed me that […]

Read More →

FORGIVENESS?

I DON’T Agree with the forgiveness movement.  I advocate honest change in behavior. I’ve seen many phrases going around that posits forgiveness as a healer, a panacea for a victims anger and discontent over what was done.  However, I know better and anyone else who has been slighted, especially by family or friends, knows better.  Forgiveness is not for the victim, it is for the person being forgiven to feel better.  I am not a fan on rushed feel good moments, because on the other side of that, is an […]

Read More →

Mothering Ourselves for personal liberation and intergenerational healing

Family relations are the basis for how we understand ourselves.  How our family sees us as children is how we learn to see ourselves as adults.  However, it is my contention and mission that when we grow up we must separate ourselves from unhealthy childhood patterns and concepts in order to connect with our true child-like confidence, curiosity and our adult wisdom.  Generational patterns can be passed through us if we do not take the time to reflect on events, acknowledge our intuition around subjects and unveil to the truth of who we are.  When we unveil and honor ourselves and feelings, we enact the ability to Mother Ourselves.  When we Mother Ourselves, we live in our own divinity. Irrespective of what your past has been, you can change the trajectory of the future. Irrespective of your present, you can change the trajectory of your future.   Join me in my #MommyMagic: Healing across generations tele-series, where we will discuss subjects such as “The Mother Wound”, why we need to stop sacrificing ourselves to false ideals, How to honor the mother within via our intuition and much more.  During this series we will be empowered to live our lives as mothers of the earth, through learning that mothering ourselves is the first step. You can register here for all or part of the series. With love, -Cecile Creative Director, MommyEvolve

Read More →

Money, Mindset, Mommy

Great day my loves.  It is always a great day to speak money, mindset and mommies making moves.  I have to get real here.  I am intelligent, quick witted and full of creative ideas.  However, I, like many can get caught in the mindset that wealth evades me.  The reason for this is simply – mindset.  I did say I have many skills and talents, besides making wonderful line of MomMeTime Products, MommyEvolve also has many services all of which I created from my essence and talents!  Yet because the wealth I envision has not manifested in the forms I want yet, I call myself unwealthy or am afraid to spend money or think about what I spend so much that it cancels out the blessing and energy of what I just spent.  Yes, you heard me very correctly.  This is not a signal or sign from GOD that you should go out and spend all the money you have…..but it is a clear expression that when you spend money on yourself and then worry about the idea that you spent it – you are telling the universe energy that you don’t like spending money on yourself.  Too many of us do it. Instead of standing in our power, knowing we are wealthy, we loath paying bills, consider money usage as spending instead of circulating and worry about money negatively all the time. Well, these are some of the things I am doing […]

Read More →